TLo

My mom mentioned that this is probably the last birthday I’ll spend living at home.

I never had to mention anything.

Mind fuck. A year for last everythings. :O

Then after that… it’s a period of new beginnings.

LALALA. I feel ready to grow up. I think 17 is the awkward age. When you’re 16, you have the license to look forward to, but at 17 all you really want is to be 18. Then the real fun begins.

Some people have that pang of nostalgia where they just want to be kids. I see where they’re coming from, but I’m pretty much still a kid. I just want more. One day, around the mid 20s I’m going to want to be a kid again… but for now, fuck it. It’s time to live it up.

I want the freedom to do what I want when I want. I want every action to bring consequences that are undeniably done by my own doing. These two summers of being alone abroad has been such a tease. It feels so good to do whatever you want, but then I get home and I’m slammed into having to think about what my parents will say. Sure sometimes it seems like I don’t give a fuck for their opinion and their failure to recognize me directly, but I’d much rather avoid conflict.

NEVERTHELESS, this last year of being a kid should be spent having my mother do motherly things for me and babying me the way she’s never done for the past 10 years of my life.

Sometimes I think I grew up too quickly.

9 months ago

THAT DAMN LOLLIPOP.

So on Friday I forgot to get the physical forms from my doctor… which means I have to drive all the way back there just to pick up a sheet of damn paper.

I also got shots that day.

Shots mean lollipops.

The nurse dude asked if I wanted a lollipop, and I was like YES PLEASE. Then I forgot to take my forms from the front office.

The lollipop was not worth it. >:O

9 months ago

Schedule for the next two weeks.

Get this. There’s actually going to be timestamps. But it’s easy.

Monday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Tuesday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Wednesday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Thursday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Friday (btw, I can finally purchase R rated tickets this day. I know, LAME)
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Saturday
Whenever I wake up till I sleep: College shit
Sunday
All day errday: CELEBRATE
Monday
8-9: Band Camp
9-11: Orientation (I’m a big kid now!)
11-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Tuesday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Wednesday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Thursday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Friday
8-5: Band Camp
8-10: Gym
11-6: Erico
Saturday
All day: Blocked out for MARIADO.
Sunday
All day: Crying
Monday
All day: Commence another half year of hell. That’s why I would be crying the day before. Oh, are we going ice skating after school?

Getting back in shape hurts. But it’s worth it.

2 notes | 9 months ago

Senior Year Goals

Oh hey. :D

Work stuff out with Ming Ming and not leave for college looking like a complete bitch.
Not get kicked out of the house before I officially leave.
Get into college.
Figure out which friends I’m really going to keep forever because it’s totally impossible to hang out with everyone after senior year ends.

Short list. Tough goals. Last chance. Let’s rock it.

9 months ago

Just so you know, I feel so fucking special.

I’m not being sarcastic. LOL.

I think it’s partly because I’m going to be a senior. It’s because I’m captain and chief. It’s because it’s like I’m on top of everything, and it’s my freaking birthday. I had to do a lot of crap at band camp, but most of it was alright. Haha.

I got wonderful cupcakes from Jazmin and Brianna <3 and band played happy birthday, and it sounded pretty awesome. And the gifts get freaking stranger and funnier and better. LOL. I can’t disclose in public. BUT TODAY LOLOL. Yep!

I got tons of midnight texts and so many fb notifs. I guess the fb ones are a bit strange since I don’t talk to most people, but they’re still nice, you know?

This is the last birthday I’m going to be spending doing the usual thing. I feel like this and band camp has official commenced the last list. You know, like last football game, last singing the alma mater together, last this, last that, last things before becoming an adult.

Then I have awesome friends. Yeah. From my multiple posts about my friends, they know that I think they’re awesome and all of you that read my posts get that I think my friends are pretty rad.

And I feel great today. LOL.

6 notes | 9 months ago